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Valerian and the City of a Thousand Ruby Rhods

Hello humans. You shall all be referred to as humans because I feel like we are above and beyond genders. I realize it has been a week since this blog has seen any action, I profoundly apologize and would like to say that there is no excuse (besides the one that we’re all busy with life, vacation, sex, money laundering, and the occasional drug). This post will be a review of the movie Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets, directed by one of my favorite directors, Luc Besson....

Issa Mummy Review

Twats and dicks, today we review the new 2017 Mummy. It stars handsome Tom Cruise: and the stunning Sofia Boutella: among others such as Russell Crowe and Annabelle Wallis. First, a little history… The Mummy came out in 1999 and starred Brendan Fraser as Rick O’Connell (the main character), Rachel Weisz (the main heroine), (insert other characters that aided Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz), and featured Arnold Vosloo as the main antagonist (the actual mummy that comes back to life)....

Movie Review: Cause Why The Fuck Not.

Transformers 5 - The last knight. Holy shit there are 5 of these things. - Dat Boi with a Rocket Launcher You would have thought that after the abomination known as Revenge of the Fallen, they would’ve stopped but NOPE. That ain’t how Hollywood works kiddes. The word of the day children is mula cause these movies easily top a billion dollars every single time they are released to the general audience....